forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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