I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize