Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Randomize
