What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
he wants to bone in the snuggie
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
