I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
