I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
she looked like the before picture.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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