Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
this will be a night to untag.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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