I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
