she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
