She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I think I sprained my soul last night
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Randomize
