Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
