dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
