Your tits are I can't wait for
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
