Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
