You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
