You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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