): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
