In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize