At least make sure they are 18
Why
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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