I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
