Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Randomize
