she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
