super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Drunk is not a location!
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
