her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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