so let's talk penis.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
my poor anus
Drake has all the answers
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
