What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
