did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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