Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
