I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Randomize
