bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
