You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
