super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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