tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
