dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
