In the future we'll all be gay
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
