their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I'm always down for nudity.
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