Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
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Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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