i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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