Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Houston, we have a squirter
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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