Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
