Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
