what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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