I seem to have left my pride at pride
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
