Kiss
Puke
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize