just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
