ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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