Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
