Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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