is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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