loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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