just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
